HIGH SCHOOL EDITION #12
By Heather Idoni
Added Monday, October 12, 2009
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The Homeschooler's Notebook
***SPECIAL SERIES - High School Homeschooling***
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Vol. 10 No 75 October 12, 2009
ISSN: 1536-2035
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Copyright (c) 2009 - Heather Idoni, FamilyClassroom.net
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IN THIS ISSUE:
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Notes from Heather
-- A Career Without College
Feature Article
-- Four Seasons of Homeschooling
Helpful Tip for High School
-- TeachersDomain.org
Answers to Reader Question
-- Alternatives to College Prep?
Additional Notes
-- Newsletter Archives
-- Sponsorship Information
-- Reprint Information
-- Subscriber Information
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Notes from Heather
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A Career Without College -- So Far!
---
My oldest hasn't opted (as of yet) to pursue a traditional college
track. He still has several CLEP exams he could do well on, if he
wanted to study for them.
However, he is well on his way to getting started in a career that
he is very excited about!
This past week, Ben interviewed and was hired for a firefighter
position in our local township. Last fall my husband invited Ben
to take an EMT course with him -- and Ben finished first in the
class while Jim was in 6th position overall out of about 35 students.
Needless to say, I was very proud of my boys!
On my husband's advice, Ben spoke to the local fire chief about a job.
He said he happened to be hiring right now and was looking at 2 other
candidates, but neither had EMT certification and they could really
use a medic. He told Ben he was a little young to be considered (at
only 19) and that he'd need to give a strong commitment to stay in
the area since they'd be spending thousands of dollars on his training
and needed to know they would be making a good investment in him.
Ben assured him that if he was given the opportunity, he would commit
to staying in the area. He was told to expect a call for an interview
within a few weeks.
The call came a few days ago and my "baby" went out on his first real
interview!! (He has held several jobs, but always for friends that
already knew him, his character and work ethic, etc.)
When Ben came home from the interview he told me that he didn't have
to talk much. The man interviewing him was so excited about the
experience on his application that HE did most of the talking!
Finally he told Ben, "I NEVER hire someone on-the-spot, but I'm just
going to give you all the paperwork to do right now. If you want
the job, it is yours."
What did he see on Ben's application that sealed the deal for him?
His Civil Air Patrol experience!
From the age of 12, Ben studied off and on with Civil Air Patrol. He
learned search and rescue, which includes map and compass work (like
"triangulation", etc.), door-to-door witness interviews, survival
skills (going out on a search with a 72-hour pack only), CPR and
First Aid certification, etc.
Through Civil Air Patrol, Ben also had leadership classes, Aerospace
science, and physical training. It is a wonderful opportunity!
Anyone can join C.A.P., from age 12 to 21. It is very low cost
(about $50 a year which covers your uniform) and then students buy
their extra gear as they go along with the program. You get to
fly a plane very early on in your training -- and most kids get
pretty excited about that!
Civil Air Patrol is a volunteer division of the U.S. Airforce,
however no one is pushed into military service. It *does* give you
a taste of military training, though. For my sons (so far) it was
enough to get the idea of going into the military OUT of their
systems, for which I am actually thankful. (I appreciate those who
serve, but I wouldn't want the added stress in my life of having
a son in the service.)
If you have a child who enjoys a challenge, consider getting them
involved in C.A.P. Most units/squadrons meet just one day a
week, year 'round.
For more information on Civil Air Patrol, visit this link:
http://www.gocivilairpatrol.com/html/index.htm
To locate a squadron near you, go here:
http://cap.findlocation.com/
---
Do you have comments to share? Please do!
Send your emails to: mailto:heather@familyclassroom.net
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Feature Article
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[I really like this article! It is especially helpful when Matt
writes about the transition from teacher to mentor in your teen's
life. Enjoy! -- Heather]
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Four Seasons of Homeschooling: Caretaker, Teacher, Parent, Friend
by Matt Binz, Mr. HomeScholar
---
Homeschool parents assume four primary roles throughout their
children's lives; that of caretaker, teacher and mentor and friend.
These four roles are not unique to homeschool parents; they just
seem to be much more intense than they are for parents who have
"outsourced" much of their children's education. Homeschool parents
know, probably better than most, the exceedingly high stakes involved
in educating their kids. If they fail, there is no external safety
net. I believe an appreciation of this concept affects how home-
school parents approach all four roles, or seasons, of homeschooling.
Caretaking: Toddlers and Teens
Like the changing seasons in my hometown Seattle, these homeschooling
seasons have no clearly defined start and stop. Parents play a
caretaking role throughout their kid's childhood. It is a role that
gradually lessens over time (although the period of caretaking in
the teenage years is probably as intense as any other time in a
child's life.) Parents who are committed to homeschooling their
children do not have the luxury of anticipating a long stretch of
childhood when the primary role of teacher will be delegated to
others. The difference in attitude this makes is as subtle as it
is important. There is a rough analogy to the changing attitudes
humans have had towards the environment over time.
When we first gathered into villages, our ancestors must have had
a dawning realization that merely moving human waste outside the
community's boundaries was a losing proposition. As time went on,
I'm sure they concluded the mess would eventually need to be dealt
with. Likewise, parents who shove the education of their kids
"outside the gates" may think that they have addressed their
responsibilities, but may wonder why "the mess" keeps coming back
to them.
The Responsible Teacher
Because they know they will be living with what they create, homeschool
parents tend to be a bit more thoughtful in the execution of these
four roles. Sure, it may be the instincts of a loving parent, but,
if we are honest with ourselves, there is also an element of self-
preservation involved. "Hmm... if I let little Timmy get away with
being disrespectful today, how will that affect our lives with him
tomorrow?" This is an important question that is not easily dismissed
when Timmy will be planted in our living room for the next 16 years.
Likewise, parents who assume a "supporting role" in the education of
their children may adopt a defeatist attitude when dealing with
behavioral problems. "Can you believe what they are teaching them
in the schools!? What is this world coming too!?" Homeschool parents,
however, recognize that success depends on their commitment and their
ability to marshal the appropriate resources to support a productive
learning environment.
Teen Truth or Consequences
Because the teaching role in a homeschool family is "supercharged",
the transition from teacher to mentor can be exceedingly challenging.
The question is -- how do you move from being the one from whom all
educational decisions flow (teacher role) to the one who must stand
by and allow natural consequences to take their course (mentor role)?
Well, sometimes the answer is "poorly".
In our home, it took awhile for us to come to grips with this shift.
Being a homeschool teacher was – for the most part – a delightful
family time. There is a bit of denial, however, when one considers
that your children won't be homeschooling forever. That is why you
never hear a homeschool mom say to her adult child, "Please don't
schedule a late teleconference, sweetheart -- you and I are doing a
unit study on toads tonight."
This is a good thing, I suppose. Mom and dad have earned the right
to snicker at their own children's struggles as they homeschool
their kids. But the transition can be difficult.
It is difficult because homeschool parents have spent years ensuring
they cover everything. They've been vigilant to not leave gaps
in their children's education. They've invested heavily in their
areas of interest. They've spent sleepless nights praying for
their spiritual journey. And then everything changes.
Kids start to grow up. They start that long and often painful
transition from childhood to adulthood. They begin to stretch
their wings. This would be a universally joyous event except for
one small problem.
They frequently screw it up.
That's right. They make mistakes. Shocking, frequent, painful
mistakes. Mistakes that surely you never made (often times true,
because you made your own shocking, frequent and painful mistakes).
Mistakes that can cost them and you dearly. And so, in this situation,
what is our vigilant, supportive, hyper-competent homeschool parent
supposed to do... ?
That's right –- let them fail!
Letting Go - Again
Uhhgh! That was the part I hated the most about homeschooling. It
got to the point where it wasn't enough to bite your tongue; I
needed to sew my lips shut. I became one of those psychotic parents
who went around muttering to myself... "I'll teach him what it means
to work hard... doesn't he understand what he's doing??..." And
because I would usually be looking down as I muttered, I'm sure the
dog was convinced he was going to get kicked.
But a funny thing happened. After awhile, they did start to learn!
I remember when my oldest was 10 months old, Lee and I could sit and
watch him for hours at the coffee table:
standwobblecrashstandwobblecrashstandwobblecrash...
I must say however, that same basic pattern isn't nearly as amusing
when they are 19. "The bigger they are, the harder they fall," has
never been truer.
But in our house, what was true at 19 was utterly different at 20.
In a year, our eldest went from ignoring everything we said to
repeating everything we said. It's true. Often, after he visited
from college, we would come away thinking we just had a conversation
with ourselves! It was miraculous. Something happened where he seemed
to internalize nearly every parental lesson we had taught over the
years (with the exception of hanging up his clothes, where he obviously
didn't get the memo.)
Fatigue and Futility
On one hand, being a mentor to your child should be easy. They are
adults and consequently get to make adult choices. What makes it
hard is that as parents we still feel SO RESPONSIBLE! You'd think
all the years of being ignored would teach us we don't have control
over our teen's choices. Intellectually, we get it. Emotionally,
Lee and I were both 100% committed to pushing that rope, tied to that
rock, up that hill.
Eventually, we didn't get smart -- we just got tired.
A funny thing happened when we let go. The kids seemed to sense that
we weren't protecting them so much and they actually started to behave
more responsibly. Imagine that! I suppose after homeschooling them
for so long, we should have known they weren't dumb. But they really
started to get it.
So you see, the key to moving from teacher to mentor is to just stop
teaching so darn much. Really. I'm serious!
You are not responsible for your adult children any more. Let it go!
If you are tempted to jump back in the middle of their lives, go find
another distraction. Get a dog! You can train a dog and (if you are
holding a biscuit) they will listen to you!
I don't want you to be discouraged, however. Mentors still get to teach.
The key is that they get to teach only when asked. You are no longer
a river of education flowing freely across the desert. No, you are a
hose and you have a nozzle. Sometimes you may feel like an extremely
high pressure hose, but you still need to be shut off until someone
metaphorically squeezes your handle.
The Friendship Factor
The last season of homeschooling -- which promises to last the longest
-- is the season of friendship. Finally, you and your kids are equals.
You may find yourself learning as much or more from them as they do
from you. You may seek their wisdom and counsel over problems you are
having (like technology issues for me).
There is freedom in just being friends. The pressure is off and the
relationship can find a center. I suppose the real payoff for all
your hard work will come when they have kids of their own. You then
may have the delight of seeing your children on their own journey
through the four seasons of homeschooling. If you are lucky, you
will be asked to play an active role throughout.
It really doesn't get much better than that.
---
Copyright Matt Binz, 2009
---
Matt Binz works with his wife Lee (The HomeScholar) in their home-
based business.
Their low monthly fee 'Gold Care Club' is like a personal high school
support group. A FREE 30-day membership is available with Lee's
e-book 'The Easy Truth About Homeschool Transcripts'.
The Gold Care Club offers audio and video courses about highschool,
priority email support, and a free 20 minute consultation each week.
Try out your 30-day membership! Just visit the following link and
read all the wonderful testimonials...
http://familyclassroom.net/truth.html
Matt and Lee's mission is helping parents homeschool high school.
Their website is www.TheHomeScholar.com.
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Helpful Tip
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http://www.teachersdomain.org/
"Here's a great resource we found. I've mainly used the science
lessons for my son (a freshman -- sort of!?). Registration is
required, but it is free!" -- Liz
---
Do you have an idea, experience, or tip to share? Please write!
Send to: mailto:HN-ideas@familyclassroom.net
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High School Question
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"My question concerning homeschooling high school is for the student
who probably isn't interested in going to college. I have one who
is a real 'hands on' learner. He loves making things, building things,
creating things, fixing things, inventing things even -- as long as
it's with his hands. Not that those things don't require using his
brain, mind you, but he's not a book learner. Let's just say, college
would not be his first choice as a goal for his future.
Would you recommend he be coaxed a little more toward the academics
he would need to attend college? Or should I settle (with him as a
freshman) on teaching basic math and minimum requirements on science,
for example, rather than higher level courses? What would you
recommend to get him ready for the work force or entrepreneurship?
Thanks." -- Lynda
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Reader Responses
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"Hi, Linda! One of the advantages of homeschooling is that we have
the opportunity to customize our children's education according to
their gifts, interests, aptitudes, and most important, God's will
for their lives. There is currently a shortage of people who have
the ability to produce and repair useful items. (The dump is full
of lawnmowers that could have been fixed and used for another decade.)
Your son could go into business for himself -- maybe even now -- and
go anywhere he wants to live and offer a service for which there is
likely a big demand. He would never lack for work. He would be his
own boss, and not at the mercy of an employer, as most college graduates
are. Vocational-technical school might be an option for him if he
needs training in carpentry, welding or some of those areas.
You're not 'settling' for anything. You are preparing him for a life
of service and to answer his calling. Yes, give him the basics in
those areas he will need -- maybe a consumer math course instead of
algebra, for example. If you can find someone who is doing what your
son wants to do, interview that man and ask him what subjects he
recommends that your son study in high school. Ask him what he wishes
he had more of, and what things were a waste of time for him.
There are a number of resources for the young entrepreneur. Check out
Vision Forum. They have a DVD series called 'Entrepreneurial Bootcamp
For Christian Families'. Christian Home Educators of Colorado has a
program called AME (Apprenticeship, Mentorship, Entrepreneurship)
which might help him find some connections.
Later, if your son changes direction and becomes more inclined toward
college, he can easily and quickly complete whatever academic courses
he needs. He will be older and he will be motivated, and those two
factors will make it easy for him. If you try to force him into
academics now, it will be a struggle for you, and could even jeopardize
your relationship with him. I'm so glad to know there are still some
budding inventors out there!" -- Mary Beth
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"I am in a somewhat similar situation, in the sense that I have one
who knows she wants to go to college, but the other says he definitely
doesn't want to go. So what I'm going to do is give him all the
subjects I think will benefit him -- so if in 4 years he decides, "Yes,
Mom, I want to go to college", he won't be behind and have to catch up
on those college-needed courses. I told him that it's fine that he
doesn't want to go; however, he doesn't necessarily know exactly what
courses would be needed to attend college, so he wouldn't know that
he was taking those college-needed courses.
Now if in a few years he does decide to go, we'll just add a few
specified courses that'll help him with a major in college. I wouldn't
want to hamper his chances to attend college. And if in the end he
still doesn't want to go, what have I done but given him a better
education?
So my advice would be not to try to coax him to do the college thing,
but to give him all the opportunities to decide on his own -- while still
preparing him educationally. Give him the tools to be able to attend
college if that is what he decides." -- Tammie
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"Lynda, The first thing I would recommend you get is a book called,
'Senior High: A Home Designed Form+U+la'.
Barb Shelton will walk you through how to take what your son does
and make it count as credits toward graduation. Regardless of whether
or not he goes to college, he will need proof that he completed high
school for a job. The book also does a great job of helping you, the
Mom, to realize that learning doesn't have to come from books necessarily.
There are lot of curriculums that are hands-on. For example, we used
a book called 'Blueprint for Geometry' that gives basic Geometry
instruction by drawing and reading blueprints.
This in turn, could inspire your son to buy a 3-D kit in which he would
build a house or other building, or maybe you know a carpenter that can
take him to work for a day to show him how the operation looks in real
life. How about experiment books to help him with Chemistry skills?
The list goes on and on. Please read the book and get inspired to guide
your son in his endeavors. He sounds destined to do great things!"
-- Noreen
---
"Don't rule out community college yet. Some of them have wonderful
technical programs for the non-academic, hands-on kinds of kids. Whether
it's just a few classes, a certificate program for a few specific classes,
or an associate's degree, your child might find it fun as well as useful.
The instructors in the machine technology department at our college (they
teach the kids how to read blueprints, do enough math to measure what
they're doing, and run the machines to make the parts for other machines)
have been very supportive of my son." -- Donna
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New Reader Question for Next Regular Issue
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Fear IS a Factor
"Homeschooling has been on my mind for years. My oldest child (daughter,
turning 15) has just started a private parochial high school. My two
sons (12/6th grade and 9/4th grade) are beginning the school year at a
private parochial grade school -- the same one that their sister attended.
Here's my dilemma -- I have felt the pull of homeschooling for years.
Fear is such a factor... fear of 'ruining their lives'; fear of what MY
friends would say/do since it is just 'not done' in our community; fear
of being really bad at it. I have been lurking around on various groups,
receiving emails from groups, and just afraid to take the plunge. The
boys (especially the 12 year old) are the ones that I am thinking of
homeschooling. The school is just not a good fit for the oldest, and I
don't think the younger would be thrilled with going to school all day
while the other one 'got to stay home'. My daughter is finally excited
about school for the first time, so I would definitely leave her where
she is. I guess my question is -- how do I take the plunge? Will it
work? What if it doesn't and I make a huge mistake? What if I have no
more time for myself since the kids don't go to school (yes, selfish, but
true.) Ugh. I definitely need some help!" -- Kathy
---
Do you have some words of wisdom for Kathy?
Please send your answer to: mailto:HN-answers@familyclassroom.net
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=====================
Do you have a question about homeschooling high school?
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