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More on Traditional Roles/College, Five Boys and... a Girl!

By Heather Idoni

Added Friday, October 19, 2007

The Homeschooler's Notebook
Encouragement and Advice for Homeschool Families
Vol. 8 No 81 October 19, 2007
ISSN: 1536-2035
Copyright (c) 2007 - Heather Idoni, FamilyClassroom.net

Welcome to the Homeschooler's Notebook!
If you like this newsletter, please recommend it to a friend!



Notes from Heather
-- A GIRL?!!, Reader Feedback
Helpful Tips
-- Cymantics: Sound Waves and Salt
Winning Website
-- Power Proofreading
Reader Question
-- Homeschooling with Fibromialgia
Additional Notes
-- Searchable Archive
-- Our Email Group
-- Sponsorship Information
-- Reprint Information
-- Subscriber Information

Notes from Heather

Five Boys and... a BABY SISTER!!

We just found out we are having a GIRL!! Woohoo!! My husband
is still in a bit of shock. He's not sure what to do with a girl.
(giggle) My due date is around February 17th... and it will also
be our very *first* home birth with a midwife! :-)

If you'd like to see a family picture with myself, my husband,
and our five boys, I just posted it to the internet a few days
ago. It is here on the front page of HomeschoolingBOYS.com:



We received more great reader feedback about college choices and
traditional roles, etc. You can read the new responses below!


"Girls, especially those managing and educating and raising the
next generation, certainly need to be educated, responsible,
capable, and above all, in my opinion, the hands of God upon
children. But college does NOT ensure those qualities! It seems
as though many equate 'attending college' with 'educated' or
'reponsible' or 'capable of managing life'. This is a common mis-
conception. In fact, four-year residential college may simply
NEGATE those characateristics and the yearning for them! Education
can be attained in many ways, and frankly, the longer I homeschool,
the more I am certain that an education can be had only through
self-education and finding good mentors and guides. I would
encourage all children to look for methods to educate themselves
-- individual college classes, apprenticeships, experience, adven-
ture, books and more!" -- Colleen S.


"We have two daughters and two sons. Our daughters graduated from
our homeschool (both K-12 homeschooled) and they are pursuing
at-home businesses/entrepreneurship. My sons are 13 and 10 1/2 and
they hope to have their own businesses someday. I do not yet know
whether they will go to college or not. My daughters knew early on
that college was not what they wanted to do and we have supported
them all the way.

My oldest is doing a cake decorating business. She has been doing
about one cake a month on average and is hoping the business will
grow over time with people recommending her services to their
friends and family.

Both my daughters are also now teaching classes for homeschoolers
in our area. They are doing a knitting class right now. They hope
to add a crocheting class, sewing class and cooking class in the
near future. They want to do this in small groups, year round.

Our high school plan for them included all the subjects that college
bound students do except for advanced math. They hate math and had
a very hard time with it. They both did Algebra I, Geometry and
Consumer Math. They were required to do a one-credit course on
each of the following: Educational Foundations (studying how to
homeschool their own kids, reading my favorite books and articles
on homeschooling and aiding in teaching their siblings for practical
experience, helping me plan unit studies, attending homeschool con-
ferences with my husband and I, etc.); Building Life Relationships
(Getting along with siblings, Courtship study, Peacemaker materials,
etc.); Home and Life Management (cooking, sewing, cleaning a home,
home decorating, chores, organizing, car and lawn mower maintenance,
some basic home repair and painting, reading about keeping a home
and practical experience doing it). They also did tons of Fine Arts
and a 1/2 credit of Typing, Health, and Computer.

We plan for our boys to do the same classes except they are better
with math and so will do advanced Math. Our son in 8th grade is
already doing Algebra I. They will do more home maintenance than
the girls did and more car/small engine repair, but will still do
cooking and housekeeping. Actually, they already do. They are
already cooking dinners with help from their sisters and me, doing
chores, helping dad with home and car repair -- and my 10 year old
is learning to knit. No matter whether they choose college, career
or their own business, they will be prepared for college and for
life as husbands and dads." -- Debbie P.


"I have a slightly different perspective on girls attending college.
I have been homeschooling my two sons ages 14 and 16, for many years
now. I love homemaking, and can't think of any place I'd rather be.
I also, however, have a master's degree in physical therapy and
worked in that field for five years before we were blessed with our
children, and worked one Saturday a month for several years.

There have been several benefits to my education. First, that income
at the beginning helped us get on our feet when we were first married
and took a great deal of pressure off my husband. Second, the skills
I learned of evaluation and goal setting (for patients) have had a
direct application to homeschooling (for children). Every day I use
the organizational and planning skills I learned in my training.
Third, even though I'm not currently working, I'm required to take
occasional 'continuing education' classes to keep up my licensure,
and my children see me having to study and learn as an adult, which
has given their studies a new perspective. As I mentioned, I love
homeschooling and homemaking, and would be content even if I never
went back to physical therapy, but I feel my education has really
helped me be a more effective teacher than I might have been otherwise.

My husband is also in the medical field, and we hope to work together
in medical missions when our children our grown. Our common interest
in health care has added a dimension to our relationship and communi-
cation that we might not otherwise have had, and I can relate to the
struggles in his workday better because of my educational background.

(By the way, physical therapy is a wonderful field for a young woman
or man - there is a tremendous need for therapists and many employers
are very willing to work with your schedule.)

So... I think it is possible to be both a homemaker and have a college
education and career -- you don't have do only one or the other.
There are different seasons of life." -- Sandy


"My husband and I have been blessed with six children -- five girls
and one son. We have encouraged our daughters to get a college edu-
cation, however, we have also encouraged them to pursue a degree that
would allow them to do something at home once they are married and
have children. Our oldest married daughter, who is expecting her
first child, has her own website business -- www.alisaprons.etsy.com
-- specialty designed aprons, note cards, recipe cards, nursing aprons
and burp cloths; another married daughter is presently teaching at a
classical school and will be able to tutor students once she has chil-
dren; our third born daughter, who is still single, is a violin teacher
in the public school system. She will be able to teach violin lessons
from home once she is married with kids. Our other two daughters are
not through with school, however, I won't be surprised if they choose
something that they too can do from home. They all know that I put
aside a commercial art career to be a wife, mother, and homeschooling
mom and that I wouldn't take that back for anything!" -- Joanne in AL


"I feel that it is important to be well-rounded and to have our girls
ready to do whatever the task at hand is. I personally have 5 children,
homeschool the oldest, go to school part-time, and work part-time
(because I have to). Yet, I am able to do all these things and try to
be the best role model to all my children that I can be. Homeschooling
is wonderful, and it can be done in a variety of ways, and with flexi-
bility. Lots of things can be taught. My children see that I can and
do try to do everything God gives me to do, and I do it with a cheerful
attitude, but I always make sure I put them first. I want them to
feel that if they need to or want to, they can do all these things as
well. I do feel, though, that if God gives us the role of wife and
mother, we should make that first and foremost, and everything else,
with a good deal of prayer and time management, can and will fall into
place. Do what is necessary, pray, and prioritize, and all things will
fall into place. My children see me as a role model and example that
all things are possible with God; and that they can do them too!"
-- Krystyna C.


"I just wanted to share from my own perspective about this. I was
raised by a working mom and did miss not having her around more and
such. My parents, along with the worldly 'wisdom' that is so prevalent
among us, looked down upon homemakers as lazy. That same wisdom
esteemed career women. Neither my friends nor I wanted to be a 'door-
mat'. Thus, my mom really didn't train me about the homemaking things,
and when I went off to college I didn't know so many things, from how
to do laundry to how to cook or balance a checkbook. I can tell you
that I managed to learn a lot of these things by doing them in real
life, and it wasn't that bad, but it took a lot more of the Holy Spirit
working on my heart to show me any virtue of staying at home (over time
God has changed my heart... I am currently a stay at home mom).

One thing I did notice though, was that knowing I was pursuing a degree
and doing what was interesting to me brought me a lot of freedom. I
don't mean that in a negative way (though obviously there are some neg-
atives to a young person having such freedom). Since high school and
on through college I knew of many women who were not doing anything for
a career. They wanted to be homemakers and have a loving family and be
moms, etc. The only thing is, many of them were definitely the most
desperate as far as men were concerned. Knowing that so much of their
happiness, livelihood, and self worth were wrapped up in this, the
issue became all-consuming for them. They would think about men, hope
about men, try to meet men, look good for men, talk about men. Men, men,
men. They seemed very shallow; so shallow that I don't think a very
godly man would consider them anyway. Their value seemed to be tied to
their ability to be desired by and attractive to a man.

All the while I saw that as so sad. I can tell you that I really
enjoyed that time in my life. I really grew closer to my Lord, and he
freed me in my spirit from 'needing a man' to be happy. I, like Paul
said, was 'content' in this circumstance. I was not searching for a
man, but God brought me a husband all the same, in his timing, whom I
met at college. I was so happy and carefree at the time that I even
tried to give him a million other reasons to not consider me. I tried
to persuade him in another friend, I told him no... but he pursued and
we have been married now for 13 years.

No young woman should count on the idea that she is going to marry an
older, richer man right out of high school. Most have to earn some
kind of living. Getting a degree or some education in the field you
are interested in can at least can boost your chances of making a
decent income while you are waiting. And that is not in vain. A young
woman can always use the extra money to save for a down payment on a
home (which might help her to stay home when she does marry, especially
if she marries the average man), or she could travel and go on missions,
build a savings for her wedding expenses, etc.

I can also say that though I stay at home, I am still glad I have a
degree. If something should happen to my husband, I am sure it would
be a boost to help me find desirable employment. Also, I think it set
me up to feel a little easier about home schooling. If I only had a
high school degree, I might not have had the courage to teach my own
children. Finally, I know one day, if the Lord tarries, I will be past
the child rearing years. I feel that having a degree will give me more
choices about what I want to do at that time.

For now, I would encourage my own daughters to follow Paul's advice
while they are waiting to meet Mr. Right:

'Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business
and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily
life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be
dependent on anybody.' (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12)" -- Mom in Alabama


Are you inspired to share some of your OWN thoughts on
a topic related to homeschooling?

Send your emails to: heather@familyclassroom.net


Piano Is EASY For Kids

Start piano at home with your child.
Put the numbered stickers on your piano.
Read music with our books.
A great way to get kids started.
Come see all the fun songs you can play!



Helpful Tip

From a member of our HomeschoolingBOYS.com group:

Sound Waves and Salt - Cymantics


Here is a cool YouTube video to watch, especially if you are
studying sound.


Do you have an idea, experience, or tip to share? Please write!
Send to: HN-ideas@familyclassroom.net

Winning Website

Power Proofreading

Take a break from the grammar workbooks and check out this site!
After this Shockwave powered site loads, your child will be asked
to help a fictional TV station get all the news ready. Since the
power has gone out and the computers are down, they need help with
proofreading the stories! Your child will select a grade level
and then choose the title of an article to work on. A text box
tells you what skills that article will be focusing on and also
has a grammar help button.

-- Cindy Prechtel, www.HomeschoolingFromTheHeart.com

Last Issue's Reader Question

"I have fibromyalgia and there are many days I have very little energy.
I am homeschooling my 13 year old twins (boy/girl). My daughter would
like to be taught like in school, with me standing up front giving
lessons. My son has ADHD and learning disabilities so I have to be
creative with his lessons. My children just don't have the spark that
makes them WANT to learn. I don't have the energy a lot of the time to
figure out how to get that spark going! My daughter is determined to go
back to public school next year for good. My husband says yes. I would
prefer her stay home. My son would rather stay home. I feel these
issues are getting in the way of just plain teaching and learning. Any
ideas?" -- Ellie in VA

Our Readers' Responses

"Hi Ellie -- I too have fibromyalgia so I know exactly how you feel.
I have hard days myself and it takes my faith in the Lord to get me
through these days.

Have you ever looked into homeschool co-ops for your daughter? This
would be an excellent alternative to sending her back to school. Some-
one else will be teaching her but she still stays home and does the
assignments given to her and you can still homeschool her. Maybe she
would be willing to homeschool at home for certain classes and then
choose two classes to do at the co-op. I would check in your area to
see if any are available. It seems to me that she is more of a tradi-
tional type learner. Also there are video courses that you can get on
DVD with someone giving a class or lecture on the subject. Maybe that
would also spark a desire for learning and homeschooling in her.

I absolutely know what it is like to have to be creative with teaching
my children. Most of them are very hands-on, especially my sons. One
of them has dyslexia and the other has auditory processing skill
issues. That is why I use unit studies with them. They love to do
activities and love to 'notebook' what they are learning. Sometimes
when I have a bad day with my fibro, I just stick with the basics. Then
when I pull out of it, we get back to our unit studies. A lot of times
though, I just grin and bear it and just do it. But I have found that
it is very worth the effort. This has stirred them more onto learn-
ing." -- Heather L. in VA

Answer our NEW Question

"My husband works for Southwest Airlines (we LUV SWA!) and one of the
benefits is that we are able to fly anywhere Southwest flies for free
-- standby, of course! I am grateful for this gift and I would like to
make the most of it. Our son is newly four and we're just starting to
homeschool him while our daughter is only a year-and-a-half. What can
I do to maximize the educational value of these trips? I know that we
can work on some things in flight, but I would also like to know what I
can do while we're waiting for our flights around the airport! Thank
you!" -- Katie in TX


Do you have some creative ideas for Katie as she enjoys 'airschooling'?

Please send your answer to: HN-answers@familyclassroom.net

Ask YOUR Question

Do you have a question you would like our readers to answer?

Send it to HN-questions@familyclassroom.net and we'll see
if we can help you out in a future issue!

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Next - One Girl's Higher Education, Science Toys, 'AirSchooling'
Previous - Traditional Roles vs. College for Girls; Does My Child Have Dyslexia?

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